HOW TO HAVE TOUGH CONVERSATIONS
Jon and Bryan have a thoughtful conversation about how to have tough conversations better. They hit on the following topics:
– The uncertainty of how Japan and the US are opening up, and the decision-making that goes into it
– The difficult conversations everyone is having in the wake of George Floyd’s murder
– Younger people trying to find their voice and know how to use it
– Asking the question: is what I’m going to say going to get me closer to the outcome I want to achieve?
– Why charged emotions make it harder to get to the real issue, which is having a productive conversation
– The first goal of every conversation is to establish a strong relationship, which requires finding common ground
– Pacing and leading is an effective strategy; it starts with meeting someone where they are willing to meet you, on common ground. From there, you can lead them closer to your opinion.
– For topical issues, the common ground is often the core truth that you can both agree on
– Pacing involves many other strategies, including mirroring body language, word usage and intonation, as well as paraphrasing their opinions
– The best time to practice pacing and leading is in everyday, low risk conversations
– Why pacing and leading can actually make you feel more thoughtful and present in your conversation
– Knowing these strategies can help you navigate when other people use them on you
– David Wood’s C.A.R.E. Model is a proven technique for preparing for and executing tough conversations
References
Pacing and Leading – ChangingMinds.org
Hustle and Flowchart podcast with David Wood – Evergreen Profits
David Wood’s C.A.R.E. Model – PlayforReal.life
Influence by Robert Cialdini – Amazon
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